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The hunt ends and the rest of our hero's adventure in Wonderland begins.
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Just thought I'd return a critique. 
The concept is interesting, however, you go into far too much detail, like you're controlling every aspect of what the reader sees. This made it very hard to read, as I would get an image in my head in the beginning but then all thoughts were torn down by, "No, no, THIS is how you're supposed to see it." As a writer, this is the last thing you want to do because you don't want the reader to feel like you think they're unimaginative, or, in other words, stupid. We don't need to know the exact size of the harpoon or the exact angle the character was holding it, OR of the exact position of the fish when he carried it on shore, OR the exact color of the water when he got there, OR of the exact depth. As you can see, it's too much information, thus becomes a drag to read.
As a fair example:
After slogging my way back for over half an hour, I had finally reached the shallow waters where I could at last stand up and remove my fins, my quarry still threaded in the harpoon.
With this narration, we can clearly see what's going on, and that's all we really need to know, as we can imagine the rest. This problem plagues every bit of this piece and doesn't allow your style to shine. Once you trim away all the unnecessary information, this lit could be a wonderful read.
The concept is interesting, however, you go into far too much detail, like you're controlling every aspect of what the reader sees. This made it very hard to read, as I would get an image in my head in the beginning but then all thoughts were torn down by, "No, no, THIS is how you're supposed to see it." As a writer, this is the last thing you want to do because you don't want the reader to feel like you think they're unimaginative, or, in other words, stupid. We don't need to know the exact size of the harpoon or the exact angle the character was holding it, OR of the exact position of the fish when he carried it on shore, OR the exact color of the water when he got there, OR of the exact depth. As you can see, it's too much information, thus becomes a drag to read.
As a fair example:
After slogging my way back for over half an hour, I had finally reached the shallow waters where I could at last stand up and remove my fins, my quarry still threaded in the harpoon.
With this narration, we can clearly see what's going on, and that's all we really need to know, as we can imagine the rest. This problem plagues every bit of this piece and doesn't allow your style to shine. Once you trim away all the unnecessary information, this lit could be a wonderful read.